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Category: 40 Things

24 – Lies Hurt Everyone

 

I don’t tell lies.

I don’t stretch the truth.

I don’t withhold information.

There was a time I did tell some lies, and I stretched the truth, and I withheld some information. I didn’t think it was a big deal. These lies were about me and I was telling them for me.

If no one knew, and I kept it to myself, what was the harm right?

WRONG!

The truth is, eventually all lies get found out, and someone always gets hurt. It doesn’t matter if you were trying to protect them or not. They are going to get hurt.

In my case, I hurt my family. The effects rippled over to my kids, and they suffered as a result of my lies, that had nothing to do with them. I was lying to protect them, and I ended up hurting them more than I would have if I had been honest.

Mostly though, I hurt myself.

My own lies, and dishonesty hurt me deeply. I didn’t think I would get hurt. When you are lying and getting away with it, you feel a little bit more invincible.

I don’t lie about anything anymore. My experience, has changed me for the better.

I am counting down the days until my 40th birthday with 40 Things.

25 – Trust Your Gut

While I don’t always want to trust my gut, the truth is that it is almost never wrong. Even when I really don’t want it to be right.

I have learned the hard way that if it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

This comes from years of trusting people I should have never trusted in the first place. It comes from getting offers dangled in front of me like golden carrots only to have them snatched away. It is from believing in fairy tales that had no chance of ever happening.

When I look back, I probably could have prevented getting a lesson in being naive nine out of ten times. I just had to trust my gut. My intuition.

If you feel like something isn’t right, or something is a little bit off, you are probably right. Trust the way you feel.

I am counting down the days until my 40th birthday with 40 Things.

26 – The Best Friends Are The Ones Who Are There When You Need Them The Most

The night my Dad died, one of the first people I called was Trudy. It wasn’t something I thought through. It was just instinctive. She was the one who shoved me and my Dad back together a couple years before he died, and sparked a relationship I may have never had otherwise.

I don’t recall anything about our conversation, except her saying “I’m on my way” without hesitation. It was nearly midnight, and she was willing to drive 80kms for a friend.

For me, that was the moment that defined our friendship. I knew she would always be there to lean on if things got really bad, and in turn I would always do the same for her.

Over the years, we have supported each other through many things. The good times and the bad times. Failed relationships, kids in trouble, Trudy’s wedding, moving homes (me, her, Omi and her daughter), funerals, career changes and several races.

We don’t always see each other. In fact there have been many times where the stretch between visits was several months. I know life, work and kids will always get in the way, and come first. But I also know if I need to talk, she is always there.

I am counting down the days until my 40th birthday with 40 Things.

27 – Listen To Your Body

Today was the day.

Right now I should be getting my are ready at Guelph Lake, preparing to race in the Duathlon. It should be my fifth one, and I was supposed to beat my personal best time that I set in 2013 of 2:24:43 – which was my first Duathlon ever and on a mountain bike.

Today was the day I was going to prove to myself I was stronger than I had ever been before and destroy that record.

But today is not the day. Not this year. Not this time.

Today my body is not ready to run a really long 7km run. I did not train enough this summer to be able to do that. I should have trained more. A lot more.

Instead I put my focus into cycling (which I have always loved more than running) and worked with Owen to make sure he reached his summer goal. Helping him reach his goal was far more important this summer.

I know I could complete it, but not the way I want to. While I can feel disappointment right now, I know that listening to my body and not putting it through the beating it would surely take today, is the right choice for me.

On the optimistic side, next year will be my year. I now have a full year to train and get ready for the race that always seems to get the best of me. Next year will be the year I am stronger, faster and better prepared than ever before.

No excuses.

I am counting down the days until my 40th birthday with 40 Things.

28 – Be You

One of the hardest things to be. Yet, one of the most rewarding.

The thing is, if you aren’t really sure who you are, how can you be you? On even the best days, I am not always sure who I am.

If I break it down, I am a Mom, a daughter, a sister, and granddaughter and a friend. While these things identify me and the roles I play, I don’t think they are what make me ME.

I am horribly stubborn to a fault, I have moments of batshit craziness and as mentioned before, I am very very impatient.  I am emotional and wear my heart on my sleeve.

I am a feminist who believes everyone is equal. I am very tough and I am independant. I am loyal to a fault, and dedicated. I am not a quitter.

I am an resistant runner, an avid cyclist and 4-time duathlete. I am a horrible swimmer, a mud run lover, and an occasional Crossfitter. I am also Yoga beginner. 

I am a good employee. I am a hard worker and a problem solver. I am moderately tech savvy. I am driven and I am a person who expects way more of myself than anyone else ever could.

I am a reader, a blogger and an amateur photgrapher. I am a cook and a baker. I am a red wine and vodka lover.

I am an adventure seeker.

It is so hard to pinpoint exactly what it is that makes me ME. Like everyone else, I have fleeting moments of self-doubt, but they pass and I continue being the complex person I am.

I am counting down the days until my 40th birthday with 40 Things.